Upon arriving in NYC, Steve was promptly abducted and forced to work in a late 1860s sweatshop. After silently perfecting ‘shoe-as-weapon’ technology, Steve pulled off a harrowing escape, leaving no survivors among both his captors and co-workers.
Steve is ready to exact comedy vengeance so awesome that it will literally inspire awe. Through a combination of dangerous overconfidence, monkey-taught Judo moves, gentle skills in unicorn loving, once in a generation allergies, and evolutionary bipedalism, he is ready to make his smarmy-mouthed asshole lineage proud.
Steve truly is the American Dream Incarnate™. Some were early adopters of Laser Disc. You, my good friend, are an early adopter of Steve. Steve will have a much longer shelf life.